How to Say 'no' to a Customer Request so They Still Think You're Wonderful.
by Nina Sunday

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It’s good to be flexible with customers and make exceptions to rules.

But how do you say ‘no’ to someone when you just cannot agree to what they are asking for? How can you manage client expectations?

HOW you say ‘no’ can make all the difference to a relationship and between keeping or not keeping a customer.

Here is a 4-step process using the example of a customer wanting you to extendan expired warranty on a camera so it can be repaired at no charge:

Step 1.

Never say 'no', instead express a wish you could do what they ask…

‘I wish I could . . .

OR SAY

I know you would like . . .

‘I know you would like us to  . . .


Step 2.

Repeat what your customer is asking:

 ‘I wish I could < extend the warranty on this camera so it can be repaired at no charge >

OR

‘I know you would like us to < extend the warranty on this camera so it can be repaired at no charge >


Step 3.

Use the word ‘But’ and blame it on a third party:

'. . . but the manufacturer doesn’t allow us to . . .'


Step 4:

Use the word ‘but’ again, and this time tell them what you CAN do, (offer an extra effort on your part)

'. . . but what I CAN do is < arrange for a quote from the workshop at no charge, so you only pay if you decide to go ahead with the repair >.


Step 5: Then, diarise to do what you say you are going to do.  Deliver what you promise.

 
Remember to:

-  have empathy . . . and sound empathetic

-  avoid using the words ‘unfortunately’, ‘can’t or ‘no’

-  diarise the action you promise

Most reasonable clients know it isn’t always possible for you to say ‘yes’ every request. 

If you give them a reason, explaining it in friendly fashion, with empathy, then they are more likely to accept a ‘no’. (And be careful with the 'blame' part.  Make sure you are not derogatory.)

I use this over the phone and in e-mails, with co-workers, friends and family as well as with clients.  Whenever I find myself considering a ‘no’ answer, I revert to the template.

It sounds better and feels better.

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Copyright Nina Sunday 2011.  All rights reserved.  Published in Sydney, Australia.

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For Business Communication training for your group of 10-16 staff in your organisation's training room, visit our Business Communication web page
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I've been asked a lot lately about how to know when to pick up the phone rather than e-mail.

Ever found yourself writing and rewriting the same paragraph over and over in an e-mail?

Or struggling to find just the right words to convey the correct tone?

That's a sure sign to pick up the phone instead.

You want to persuade someone to say 'yes', or there's been no response to a request - pick up the phone. 

You are reaching a deadline and need to convince them of the urgency - it's time to phone.

You have to convey disappointing news?  Pick up the phone and dial.

UCLA Professor, Albert Mehrabian, demonstrated that words alone convey only 7% of the message.  Tone of voice is 38% of the message, while facial expression and body language is a whopping 55%.

What does this mean when writing e-mails? It means we need to include words that add 'conscious positive tone' and friendliness to our e-mails. 

For example, start with a friendly opening such as:                           
- Hope you are well.                           
- Thank you for your e-mail. If a friendly phrase is absent, your e-mail might sound too abrupt.

And make sure every time you make a request you include the word 'please'.  (You'd be surprised how often that magic word is missing.)

Rock musician and humanitarian, Bob Geldof, told a conference 'an ill-considered e-mail can destroy a deal.'

Consider the attributes of a phone call:

1.  It's a dialogue. (E-mail is a monologue).

2.  You don't have to say everything you are thinking all at once.

3.  You can monitor or adjust what you say, even as you speak, based on your listener's reactions.  Even their non-verbal guttural sounds ('Oo!, Hmm?, Oh) can express much.

4.  Your vocal tone influences how the message is received.

With e-mail there's a lag between when you send it, when it's read, and when you read their reply.  Any confusion or ambiguity can fester during this limbo period.

5.  With a phone call, you can generally tell if you're getting your message across.

Case study:

One of our clients scheduled our Business Communication one-day workshop in response to their experience with junior members of the team who tend to over-rely on e-mail.

As a PR exercise, the firm decided on a client mailout to inform clients about upcoming changes to tax law. 

This information was only useful if it was sent out before the end of the financial year, so clients could take appropriate action.

Members of staff assigned the task of executing the mailout simply sent an e-mail informing Admin staff this is going to happen.

No request, 'Would you be willing to assist the firm raise its profile with its clients?'
No perception of choice.

Instead of a Planning Meeting explaining the benefit to clients and to the firm, generating enthusiasm for the extra effort involved, an e-mail was sent.

The e-mails were simply ignored by the recipients, until the deadline loomed and there was a mad rush to complete the mailout, (which included a weekend shift!).

With any special project, first win the hearts and minds of the people involved.  It's hard to lead an extra effort through e-mail alone.Know when the power of influence is better gained face-to-face or over the phone.

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Copyright Nina Sunday 2011.  All rights reserved.  Published in Sydney, Australia.

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For Business Communication training for your group of 10-16 staff in your organisation's training room, visit our Business Communication web page
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Business Communication Tip

1. First, agree on ideal wording.Perhaps you have samples from members of your team who are better at written expression, who write in Plain English using more effective phrases. Model your ideal responses based on those. 
For example, can you notice a difference in feel between:
'You are required to . . . ' and 'To comply with the GST Act, please . . . '?

2. Decide where to file it. 

Don't just save it as a draft e-mail in Drafts. Create a fresh sub-folder under Drafts, so it's archived and can't accidentally be sent and disappear. 

For example, a typical request from Accounts division might be to ask a client for their bank details.

The file path might be: 'Drafts / Accounts / Bank details request'

Include the date of this update, for example:
'Updated 15 June 10: Drafts / Accounts / Bank details request'

Write at the top of the e-mail in a contrasting colour (blue is good), this path to save. 

(Remember to delete this from the top each time you forward.)

3. Start subject line with 'E-MAIL TEMPLATE:'

This alerts recipients it is to be saved as a template. It also means they can locate all templates in their inbox by 'Subject' if multiple templates are received.

4. Send to your template distribution list.

Including the file path at top of the message body ensures recipients know the correct sub-folder to drag message to file for later forwarding.

Periodically the Team Leader checks each staff member's PC for:

- Are all templates moved from inbox to sub-folders?
- Has the previous template been deleted when a replacement is received?
- Has everyone used the same sub-folder category titles?

Things to remember before forwarding

1. Delete 'FW: E-MAIL TEMPLATE:' from start of subject line.

2. Delete date and file path at top of message body.

3. Add name of recipient after 'Dear' or 'Hi' and change font to same colour as message body.

4. Personalise the message relevant to your needs.

5. Sign-off as yourself.

What makes a customer-friendly e-mail?

1. Open with a salutation: 'Dear' or 'Hi' and their name e.g. Dear < Name >, Hi < Name >.

Whichever form you use is part of branding, affects client perception and should be consistent throughout the organisation.

2. If it's possible to start with a thankyou, always start with a thankyou.
'Thank you for your invoice.'
'Thank you for your e-mail.'
'Thank you for your update.'

Starting with a thank you adds positive tone and enhances the client relationship.

3. Whenever any action is requested, embed 'please' in the question.

Does . . .
'Please amend the billing name on all future invoices.'

sound better than . . .
'Could the billing name be amended on all future invoices?'
where 'please' is missing?

4. In a template, it's ok to add generic fields such as <date>, <location>, <number>.

For example, here's the start of a Brainpower confirmation of booking template:

'Updated 28 May 10: Drafts / Onsite /Confirmation

Dear X X X

Thank you for confirming < Day Date > for your workshop in < Topic >.  
So we can take care of all the details, next step is for us to . . .'

5. Sign-off with a standard signature block or add generic fields to insert one's own, such as:

'Sincere regards'
< Name >
< Title >

You can make generic fields stand out as a reminder to complete by using a contrasting colour. Remember to change to black before sending.

Your Business Voice

Your choice of words talks to your reader. It's called the writer's voice. In literature, Ernest Hemingway's voice is different to Patrick White which is different to James Joyce.

In the world of business, client e-mails have a voice too.

Every e-mail you send is a moment of truth, that is, customers make a decision about whether it's easy and pleasant to do business with you (or not).

No message is neutral. You are either enhancing your organisation's perception or detracting.

If it's too wordy, if there's no white space in the layout, if tone is too robotic and distant, it influences your client perception.

Consider the business voice in this opening of an e-mail in the Standard Style:

'We are in receipt of invoice number...' 

This style is what authors of 'The Cluetrain Manifesto' call 'robo-voice'.  Cluetrain authors urge us to write instead with a human voice.

On the bookshelf next to my copy of Cluetrain was an antiquarian book, 'The Companion Letter Writer' published by F. Warne & Co. 

One of its business letter-writer template responses started with 'We are in receipt of . . .' 

What year was it published?
Answer: 1866.

If your communication still uses 'We are in receipt of . . .', it's not last century, but in fact century-before-last.

Your correspondence is your organisation's image, branding and perception.

Tips

1. In Outlook, use SHIFT-ENTER instead of just ENTER at the end of each line while amending your template to ensure single-spaced lines rather than double-spaced.

2. If font formatting goes awry, change to Plain Text, then amend. Once amendments are done, change back to HTML before sending.  It's an idea to keep HTML formatting in templates basic, so swapping to Plain Text, then back to HTML, is effortless.

[Here's an advanced HTML to Plain Text to HTML tip:

If one part of your HTML template is nicely formatted and does not need to be changed, cut that section [Control+X] before changing to Plain Text. 
Do your changes.
Change back to HTML, then paste [Control+V] the nicely formatted section back in. Voila! It's done.]

Action Summary

1. Don't reinvent the wheel by letting individuals write fresh e-mails each time for commonly used text.

2. Identify who has the best writing style and use their words as the basis for your templates. Get the team involved drafting the final wording.If you wouldn't say it like that over the phone, you wouldn't write it in an e-mail. Write the way you speak (without becoming too informal.)

3. Set up the convention of a template having:
- First words of the subject line are 'E-MAIL TEMPLATE:', with the actual subject line to be used following, for example:
'E-MAIL TEMPLATE: Please send us your bank account details.'
- Date and file path to save

4. Continuously improve your wording and update the templates to your distribution list.
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Copyright Nina Sunday 2011.  All rights reserved.  Published in Sydney, Australia.

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For Business Communication Skills training for your group of 10-16 staff in your organisation's training room or for a speaker at your conference, visit our Business Communication Skills training web page
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